Trust and distrust, then, are not opposites. In fact, they can be allies: they can work in harmony to secure trustworthiness. They are very independent and sometimes fight. They can both be dominant and both be submissive. However, when working for the same healthy goal together, they are our best tools for secure, productive, fulfilling relationships. Thus, I will add to Rachel Botsman’s excellent definition: Trust is a confident relationship with the unknown, and a guiding distrust of the known. The Currency of Interactions There’s nothing that compares with the destructive nature of broken trust within society, organizations, and relationships. Encouragingly, there’s nothing that equals the strength of the bonds between us when we do trust each other. Trust is our most fragile and most precious asset. The more we trust, the more empathetic we are with one another, and the more we trust, the more trustworthy we become to those around us. Trust is a powerful societal glue. It builds the roads to stronger societies, better organizations, and richer relationships. “Money may be the currency of transactions, but trust is the currency of interactions.” 7 There may be no better way to express our humanity than this. However, we should not be naive when we decide to trust. How can we trust with confidence? The answer is found as we separate the roles of trust and distrust. Healthy distrust offers a safe starting point, and provides the Trust Flywheel with the friction needed to make a strong decision to trust. We must understand that distrust is a necessary ally to trust. We cannot safely trust without healthy distrust. The goal is not to eliminate all distrust. Instead, our goal is to move distrust from a reactive “Guard Dog” to a well-trained “Guide Dog.”
How the Brain Processes Trust and Distrust
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